I was a police officer. Money was great. Yet totally unhappy.

Unfulfilled by the work. I wanted to help those who were looking to evolve and totally transform their life. Those who want to chase after their dreams, become the best version of themselves and live a life where they are beside themselves because it feels so damn wonderful. 

And I was met with people who argued for their limitations and were not ready YET to believe in their most magikal selves. And it was frustrating as heck. My work climate sucked and my light wasn’t enough to make it work for me.

My heart just didn’t feel the love it once had for that type of service…

So I did it. I burnt the boats. For the 3rd time.

It’s always been my way of doing things.

That was 9 years ago. And I jumped into coaching. In my pocket, I had a PhD in Therapeutic Counseling and a coaching certification. Of course things were going to work out!

Only they did not.

My ego didn’t like that.

Logically, I had everything I needed to succeed. As a human I had it all.

Only I didn’t believe in myself. 

You know how hard it is not to succeed when everybody looks at you and they see confidence oozing out of you. Only you don’t feel it?

The money situation. It crumbled. Down the drain. Found myself at the verge of bankruptcy. 

The thing is… (warning, this piece here is something) 

Every cop makes the same amount of money. It comes with the job. I didn’t even have to label myself as a good police officer to make good money. It was a by-product of the job.

I rocked at it. My heart was in service and frankly I am made to serve in chaos… That’s why the wonderful humans in my world thrive in their hardest times. It’s natural for me to remember the dream in hard times and to dive into the darkness with absolute faith. Their Soul called me in as that catalyst to guide them to ascend to their next level of evolution. (I am so grateful I get to be me with you!)

But here is the thing. 

When I quit the police job, although I had been an entrepreneur for over 14 years already as a sideline, I became a full-time entrepreneur. Unlike the police job, no fixed amount of money comes with the job. 

It’s the reality of “see your value and the world will reflect it back to you”. 

Only I DIDN’T SEE MY VALUE. 

Only I could not see that I didn’t see my value as a police officer. The circumstances hadn’t yet given me the opportunity to know myself in that way.

🙋🏼‍♀️Anybody else having dreams that are so big that you just go, I can’t be that person?

I saw my absence of results. 

🙋🏼‍♀️Anybody else here feeling the pressure of the absence of results? Anybody else, kind of not knowing who they are and what they bring to the world? 

Anyone else heard tons of coaches talking about their results (not to impress us but to impress upon us that it is possible for us too) but at the same time, they say DO NOT BUY FROM SOMEONE WHO HASN’T DONE IT YET?

That really DESTROYED the little self confidence left. I felt DOOMED. No fucking chance. So I put my dream on the sidelines again.

And maybe you bought that as if it was the truth of you? But IT JUST PERPETUATES THE CYCLE OF YOU NOT BEING THAT PERSON WITH THE RESULTS… And when we take action from there, it’s no fun. 

And it’s like playing darts, only with no target. It goes nowhere…

Of course I was just starting as a coach. And I shamed myself for not having done it yet. Repeatedly. Told myself something must be wrong with me ‘cause I am taking action and I get nothing.’

Only I was not believing in my dream. It was a mere wish.

And I couldn’t see my value past my absence of results. And I was told by leaders to buy from those who have results. If we only buy from those who have results. 

We may be by-passing our intuition. 

No matter what results you are looking for, KNOW THIS: 

No one is buying our results. It’s not even about us. It’s about the PERSPECTIVE we offer people. It’s our gift. People buy our gifts. Our gifts are ALREADY fully ACTIVATED. 

Results are IRRELEVANT. 

What creates the world is GIFTS. Your GIFTS.

I couldn’t remember the human who already IS that person. I kept thinking I am not that person YET. I kept on thinking I will be, only LATER.

I couldn’t even envision the idea that someone would choose me. Me? 

Because well if you navigated the streets of my mind, you would know that I am not that special. The thoughts that stuck around most were kind of “You don’t know enough. You were inadequate there, there and there and see you got no results there. Told you you were inadequate. I can’t be that person. Can’t have my dream.”

That was Soul Crushing.

Took so many courses. I know you did the same.

Worked relentlessly with mentors that are beyond gifted. Thinking this time it will work. This time I will discover WHY it’s not working.

And I still couldn’t see my gifts. 

Your value will never be found simply in transforming the lowest vibrations. 

I have had to teach myself the path to seeing, feeling, receiving my worth. I have had to learn to acknowledge me. My way. 

I invested so much in formulas where they tell me exactly how to do it.

Only

#1 I can’t follow a recipe. It is not who I am. I must adapt every formula to make it mine: must be playful and easy. Otherwise, it’s prostitution. I have fought against that in my previous career remember? And now, I am thinking there is absolutely nothing wrong with prostitution unless you don’t want to do it. 

#2 I couldn’t see my value so I wouldn’t do it.

I shamed myself for so long: Can’t you just follow a recipe?

We know it works.

Just do the THING.

But you can’t make the recipe work if you don’t KNOW with absolute conviction you are that person.

For some of us, doing the dirty dark stuff is easy. We go there and we transform. But results are still not showing up. It’s not because we are doing the wrong thing.

It’s because we have not yet learned to go to the place of absolute magik, the place where it is already done CONSISTENTLY. In that place where it actually exists. We have not learned to play with timelines and bring it back here.

I would see the darkness, but not all the golden nuggets it contained. The more I went deep within with curiosity and looked at all the wonderful gifts and surprises I held, the more magik that I was able to pull out of my darkness. PRICELESS. And things started to shift and evolve for the better.

That’s what we do in my world. We merge worlds. We make space for the most magikal you to come to life, fully. In your grandness. We fill ourselves to the rim with our own recognition and we overflow. We self-validate.

The thing with us is that we are DEEP. We love the depth. 

Because you play in your depth every day, it feels very surface. It is not. 

We have sooo much to bring to the world ALREADY.  So I lead you into adventures unfolding the riches that you hold.

It’s my best LOVE story ever. I kept going. And my dream came true. And it’s just the beginning. For me and for you. 

There are many ways to play in my world. If you are not receiving my love letters, it’s time to get your love fix. Register right here.

If you know it’s time, even though you are shit scared while feeling beyond excited for what the future holds (because you have seen it a million times in your heart) and you are ready to give it a SHOT your way, pick the experience you want to live with me or write to me and we’ll figure out which experience is the most LIFE-GIVING for you right now…

ShapeSHIFTER

SoulSpark Coaching

Brand NEW YOU

The SHIFT

Let’s be honest. It’s not the results we want. We don’t give a shit about the results. We wanna be used. We wanna feel. We wanna feel good. We wanna feel alive. We wanna feel unstoppable. We wanna feel like we are heading to our dreams and we wanna feel like we are making a difference. And so we do.

Remember, You’ve got this.

Just PLAY. YOU. YOUR WAY.

M